Well, hello strangers!
It's been awhile since I've posted on here. There really isn't any reason for the lack of posting. I've just felt a little uninspired and frankly, a lot depressed. Not about anything in particular, just felt like I was living in a fog, like I was just going through the motions. I just let that occasional emptiness that everyone feels in their life at one point or another creep in and settle.
Don't get me wrong, a lot of good has come my way in these last few months.
I got to hang out with a baby tiger (and crossed it off the bucket list).
I adopted two new babies into my life, Duchess and O'Malley (named after the Aristocats). They are my pride and joy and my best friends.
I started classes again at Metro in Denver (including Italian, which is also on my bucket list).
I celebrated my 22nd birthday in Fort Collins with my friends.
And had the best Valentine's Day when they dropped the charges against Brandon.
But in spite of all these great memories that I've made so far in 2013, I still feel immobile. Like I'm not going anywhere in my life or with my life. 2013 is the year I'm supposed to be graduating from college (although that is not going to happen) and finally get to begin the real "adult" stage of my life. I feel like I'm supposed to know what I want to do with my life at this point. I don't have the slightest clue.
To remedy this "depression" stage of my life, I have decided to do something drastic. I decided to follow the wise words of Mark Twain and "throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, explore, dream, discover." I just put in an application to Semester at Sea.
Basically, Semester at Sea is a program where you get on a big boat with tons of other college students and sail around the world. For the semester I applied for, it's 106 days, 15 cities, and 12 countries (including a country I have never even heard of!)
It already scares me. I am afraid of leaving Brandon for so long, being away from my cats, family, and friends. But that is the reason I need to do it. I am used to my own little bubble and things always being the same. But I am not okay with it and I think that is what has brought on this depression in me.
I crave adventure. I crave travel. I want to see the world.
Despite of the negative feedback I've received, I have that gut feeling this is something I am supposed to do. I know that if it is meant to be, doors will open and financing (which is going to be the biggest obstacle as it's nearly $30,000 for me to go on this voyage) will get taken care of so that I am able to go on this great adventure. I truly believe that this is an opportunity of a lifetime and I will regret not taking that chance for the rest of my life if I do not go. So I'm going to go.
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